Forgive Yourself
by sej1986
Summary: AU beginning of Season 4. Mason's still alive and running CTU. Jack arrives for the DOD budget meeting, but brings Audrey with him. The title refers to the line in S2, when Mason tells Jack to find a way to forgive himself for what happened to Teri.


_**Forgive Yourself**_

It was going to be a difficult day. The train bombing was causing him all kinds of headaches, and to add to the mix he had a meeting scheduled with someone he hadn't seen in eighteen months. It was a meeting of convenience; he wasn't looking forward to it and he suspected the other man was just as wary.

George Mason pushed open the door of his office and headed down to the bull pen. His bullpen. One he'd wanted to desperately to leave, feeling himself so much better suited to a high power pen pushing job at Division, and yet events of four and half years previous had changed his mind. He'd almost died. They'd thought he had radiation poisoning. Those few hours of facing what looked like inevitable death had given him a chance to reassess his life, something he should have done before he'd even gotten into the Government. He'd told Michelle not to wait for her life to happen; it was time to take his own advice. Staying at CTU and helping his country was what he was meant to do, and if it meant taking crap from Division every now and then, so be it.

"Mr. Mason, sir, there seems to be a time discrepancy with the train bombing."

George paused in his way to the main doors and back tracked to the comm. unit, where the ever smiling face of Chloe O'Brian was glaring back at him. "A discrepancy? How long?"

"Well, according to the chatter it was meant to be eight am."

Mason frowned. "Okay. It's just gone seven here, and it's after ten on the east coast."

"Exactly. And there's a name. Shariq," Chloe went on, bringing up a picture for the Director. "He's from Turkey; that's where the chatter came from about the train bombing."

She was good. He and Jack had done the right thing, hiring her. She stared at him expectantly. "Start cross checking everything on him with what we know about the bombing, and co-ordinate with other agencies if need be," he instructed, seeing her nod in acknowledgment. Satisfied that Chloe had everything under control, George started to move away and towards his original destination.

"Hey, Almeida, I don't pay you and your wife to make out," he called in greeting, positioning himself behind the couple and causing them to break apart. "Morning, Mr. Mason," Michelle murmured, cheeks flushing.

"George," Tony nodded.

"So listen, am I still on for this damn meeting with the Defense department?"

"Don't sound too thrilled," Tony muttered, typing at the keyboard and bringing up the day's itinerary. "Yep, he's still coming."

"Damn, I was hoping that would have changed in the time it took me to get from my office down here."

"Why couldn't Heller make it himself?" Michelle wondered aloud. Mason shrugged. "Beats me. The guy never has liked us; he made that clear in this latest budget cut of his. That's what I've got to try and sort out this morning."

Tony snorted. "Yeah, good luck with that."

"I'm glad you find this so amusing, Almeida."

"Mr. Mason, sir, your seven thirty is here," a voice chirped from behind him. Not bothering to turn, George muttered a thank you. "Here we go," he said darkly. "While I'm gone, I want the two of you to work closely with Chloe; she's on to something with this train bom- why the hell is that woman with him?" he said abruptly, drawing himself to his full height and staring incredulously at the pair now walking through the security gates.

Both Tony and Michelle followed his gaze, "Oh, that's Audrey Raines, Secretary Heller's dau-"

"I know who she is," Mason retorted. "I just want to know why she's here. Heller specifically stated it would just be Jack." He rolled his eyes heavenward. "Great. This is all I need. The man himself can't be bothered to make it so he sends Barbie and Ken here to do his dirty work." So annoyed was he that he missed the grin that Tony tried in vain to suppress. "That pretty much sums it up, yes," the younger man agreed, watching as his former co-worker began making his way towards them.

George raised an eyebrow. "Is there something going on here that the two of you know about but I don't?"

Michelle exchanged a glance with her husband before replying, "They're seeing each other, sir. They're involved."

"Oh, my God," Mason muttered, shaking his head. "Well, I guess this could be fun." He started walking away.

"Oh, and George?" Tony got to his feet and hurried after the Director. "Heller doesn't know."

George snorted. "The hell he doesn't." Turning away, he plastered a smile on his face and extended a hand towards Jack, leaving Tony staring disbelievingly at his retreating back. "Let him put his foot in it if he wants to," Michelle advised, joining him. "You know what he's like; he speaks his mind. Jack can handle him."

xxx

"Jack! So nice to see you. I don't suppose you expected to be back here quite so soon this time, did you? I must say, I thought you'd give it a couple more months." Mason beamed at his former employee. "There's no national crisis needing your attention, so this time when I tell you to leave, just leave, okay?" He noticed the confusion that fell across Audrey's face. "He's a stubborn one, is our Jack," he explained.

"George, believe me, I'll be more than happy to leave as soon as this meeting is over." Jack shook Mason's hand with warmth, but his tone was hesitant and the older man saw his razor sharp blue eyes scan the floor at least twice while they exchanged greetings. George frowned but said nothing, motioning instead for the stairs. He and Audrey walked ahead; looking back he saw Jack linger briefly at the comm. unit. Whatever he said to the lead analyst, it elicited a smile; something, Mason reflected, he'd never seen before. He rolled his eyes again. "Jack, stop disrupting my staff," he called, watching the former agent bow his head almost shyly. "And Almeida, you might think I can't see you and Dessler from up here, but believe me, I can."

George held the door to the office open, waiting until Jack had caught them up before stepping inside and indicating the chairs he'd laid out for them. Audrey hovered, unsure. "Ms. Raines, please, take my seat; I'll go grab another one." Audrey managed an uneasy smile, sitting down gingerly next to Jack and looking around in distaste. "I hope this doesn't take long," she muttered. "I told Dad we'd meet him back at the hotel after his meeting with Richard."

"We won't be too long," Jack murmured, placing his briefcase on the desk and popping it open. "Let your Dad have a while with Richard."

"It's not Dad I'm worried about," Audrey said tartly. Jack frowned, just as Mason pushed the office door open, a spare chair in his hands. "Wasn't interrupting anything, was I?"

Audrey flushed and looked away abruptly. Jack shot Mason a warning look. "George, Audrey is Secretary Heller's daughter-"

The older man waved a hand in dismissal. "She's your girlfriend, Jack." To Audrey, he went on, "We're all adults here, Ms. Raines." Settling himself down, he regarded Jack with a questioning glance. "Shall we get started?"

Audrey stood abruptly. "I have a phone call to make," she informed them. "May I step outside?"

"Sure," George shrugged, moving to stand but quickly seating himself again at the expression on the woman's face. As the door closed behind her, he refocused his attention on Jack, not missing the dismay clouding his features. "Something I said?"

"She's worried about her father," Jack replied briefly, selecting the relevant papers.

"Okay."

"She shouldn't be too long."

"Okay."

Jack shot his former boss a challenging look. "If you've got something to say, George, just say it."

Mason shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips. "Audrey Raines?" he asked, taking his cue.

"I don't concern myself with your personal life; I'd thank you not to concern yourself with mine," Jack said curtly.

"There's not much for you to concern yourself with," Mason quipped. The younger man remained silent, his eyes on the paperwork in front of him. "Are you happy?" he tried again. "Because you sure as hell don't look it, sat there in that fancy suit of yours."

"What would you know about being happy?" Jack's voice bordered on casual, but the words had bothered him. He tugged self-consciously at his tie.

"A lot's changed."

"You're still here."

"So are you."

"Not out of choice."

Mason raised an eyebrow. "No? You mean you put up an argument when Heller asked you to attend this meeting on his behalf, knowing it would mean setting foot in the building that you hold responsible for ruining your life?" He leaned forward. "How long have you been working for him? A year?"

"I didn't come here to talk about my new job, or my relationship with Audrey. I'm sure you don't particularly care about either."

The Director smiled sadly. "That's where you're wrong, Jack. You know, you didn't have to leave."

Jack laughed. "I wasn't exactly given much of a choice, was I?"

"Division's call, not mine."

"Yeah."

"She's taking a while... she doesn't like it here, does she?"

"She's worried-"

"When I said find a way to forgive yourself, I didn't mean this."

"Excuse me?"

Mason indicated to the briefcase, and again to the suit. "I didn't mean pretend to be something you're not."

"Jack? Jack, Dad says he's finished at Richard's; we should be as quick as possible here," Audrey announced, gliding smoothly into the office, cell phone in hand, her hair impeccable atop her head. She frowned in dismay as she noticed the untouched budget proposal on the desk between the two men. "Haven't you started yet?"

"We were waiting for you," George responded, reaching hastily for the form and scanning his eyes across it briefly. "Yeah, this is fine. Let me just get a pen... oh, hold on. Ten percent? No, I thought we agreed fifteen?"

"The Secretary felt that was too generous," Audrey informed him. "Ten percent should be adequate-"

"I'm telling you, it isn't." Mason handed her the paperwork. "We cannot possibly continue to run on such a low section of the budget, Ms. Raines. Fifteen percent increase, or I will take this to the President."

Jack observed this quietly, knowing the other man to be right. "We'll discuss it with the Secretary," he assured the Director.

"No, Jack, we will not." Audrey snatched the form from Mason's proffered hand. "We've already discussed it. This is _final._"

"I haven't signed it," he reminded her, waggling his pen.

"Then _sign _it," she muttered. "Jack, we need to be leaving. This has taken far too long. We've another meeting at nine," she added, unnecessarily. "Next time, I'll do this on my own."

The underlying meaning of her words was very clear. Mason watched as Jack's face fell, saw the younger man argue with himself, his blue eyes focussed on a particular spot in the corner of the room in an attempt to keep his temper in check. Sighing almost inaudibly, Mason took the form once more. "I'm not happy about this," he muttered, crossing out the 'ten' and replacing it with 'fifteen, please reconsider'. Scribbling his signature at the bottom of the page, he added a small piece of his mind before refolding the sheet and handing it back, a look of triumph on his face. "Sorry to have detained you, Ms. Raines," he said, getting to his feet. "Please, allow me to escort you back to the floor."

Audrey glanced at her watch, and then at Jack who was still seated. "Jack?"

"Yeah," he murmured, his eyes meeting Mason's briefly. "Thanks, George, for this."

"My pleasure."

They took the stairs slowly, Audrey's impatience clearly audible over the chaos of the main floor. Tony rose to meet them, noting the pained expression on Jack's face. "Everything alright?" he asked the Director as they passed.

"Not now, Almeida. I'll co-ordinate with you in a minute."

Tony backed away, nodding briefly at Jack. Audrey was already at the main doors, apparently not needing to be shown the way out of the building. "Sure, but George? We've got something. A link to a dry cleaner's down town. Shall I send Ronnie and Curtis?"

His attention diverted, Mason placed a brief hand on Bauer's arm, hurrying towards the comm. unit with Tony on his heels. "Chloe, let me see what you've got," he ordered. He leaned in towards the analyst and read the information on the screen. "Excellent. Yes, send out Ronnie and- Jack! Damn it, Jack, just go, okay? Audrey's waiting for you." He held out his hand. "Don't involve yourself in this, Jack. We've got it. You want to do something for us? Okay. Try and convince the Secretary to change his mind about the budget; you know we need the money."

"I'll try," he promised, standing back as Mason barked orders to his field ops team. "You'll be hearing from us."

"Great, fine, brilliant." Mason paused. "Look, Jack, I'm sorry. This probably wasn't the best day for a meeting."

"You can't predict terrorists."

"True. And Jack? About what I said up there-"

The younger man shook his head. "It's fine. I didn't come here to get your approval on my relationship with Audrey."

"You don't need my approval," George assured him, grabbing up a headset.

Jack managed a smile. "I'm so glad we agree."

Mason shook his head. "That's not what I meant. You're a smart guy, Jack. You only need to look in the mirror to see that your relationship with Audrey isn't right." Pausing to co-ordinate with the field teams, he went on, "I can see why DC was tempting, just like taking the plane down was a good idea four and a half years ago. I talked you out of that-"

"So now you're going to talk me out of this?"

"You're listening, aren't you?"

It was a rhetorical question. Jack backed away further, Mason's attention already refocused on the mission currently underway. He nodded again at Tony, smiled at Michelle. Chloe was already in the thick of whatever was taking place at the dry cleaner's; he caught her eye and savoured the sense of calm that ran through him, a calm he hadn't felt in a long time. In his pocket, his cell phone began vibrating. Audrey. Audrey was waiting. With a pang, he walked slowly away from the comm. unit.


End file.
